The Democratic Party of Wisconsin announced this week it will no longer be participating in elections or running candidates for elected office and will instead seek to implement policy through favorable court rulings.
In a related press release it was announced Havbin Rypen and Huoff will now be the legal arm of the Democratic party.
Democratic spokes-person Ima Lyar reading a prepared statement said. "We can no longer rely on voters to elect candidates we want them to. Instead we will be focusing our efforts on putting judges in place who will enact Democratic policy through the courts and backing only judicial candidates going forward."
Further explaining the move Lyar said, "look this is a win win for all, we can allow the electorate to vote on the candidate of their choosing while completely ignoring election results and getting the policy we want no matter what the people think is best for them"
When questioned whether or not this was going to be embraced by lifelong Democrats and moderates or Independants who back the party Lyar said. "Corporations, Koch Brothers, Fascist, Working Families, The Children , Job Creation and Education". When it was pointed out she did not answer the question and instead read from a queue card titled , Key Words to Emphasize Lyar quickly had a restraining ordered enacted against the reporter.
Turning the press conference over to the spokesman from the new law firm I. Gonasuya said the new law firm will be suing any citizen who opposed the action or who refuse to donate to the Democratic party.
The Associated Press later reported the entire state of Nebraska was under injunctions from Havbin Rypen and Huoff and large tracts of northern Indiana had been sued as well as most of New Jersey. To date the only state without a pending lawsuit was California where the loss of Democracy was hailed as "True Progress"
NOTE: This is not an Onion Article and is meant as parody only
Very Interesting!!!!!!
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